Wednesday, November 11, 2009

The good, the bad, and the beautiful

Andrew and I adore our greyhound Lucas to a sickening degree. He is definitely beyond spoiled. But sometimes we harbor some seriously mixed feelings towards our boy.

Don't get me wrong. He can be a total sweetheart--patient and kind. He's not at all a kissy dog, but he is more than willing to accept any love you throw his way.


Luke accepting my drunken hugs as I return home from my bachelorette party.

Just this weekend, we were at the vet when we met Charlie, a small three-legged dog with a big personality. I walked Luke over to Charlie to say hi, and that's when Charlie was shot by Cupid's arrow. Charlie was smitten. Even though he was missing a leg, he jumped all over Luke, slathering him in big wet doggy kisses. What did Luke do? He stood there like a perfect gentleman--accepting this brilliant display of affection--though I don't think he returned Charlie's strong feelings. I thought it was adorable that Luke let this tiny eccentric thing jump all over him--never batting an eye.

His patience is abundant. He is accepting of all mild forms of torture inflicted upon him...


A not amused Luke wearing my bachelorette sash and bow.

But he's not always so angelic. No, sir. See, Luke is battling an addiction of sorts. A filthy addiction. Phew... this is hard to say. I'll just blurt it out and get it over with. Luke eats trash. If it's in his presence, he's eating it. It doesn't matter what it is. Old towels, coffee grounds, styrofoam, animal fat (yum!), empty bottles of drain cleaner (yikes!)--his palate is quite undiscerning.

There's no photo of this--but believe me, we have had plenty of opportunities to capture the scene of the trash can on its side, days' worth of garbage trailed through the house. We just aren't in a very photogenic mood when we return home from work to find this disgusting surprise awaiting us. Usually, instead of running for the camera, we simply curse for a few minutes. We eventually realize that swearing does not make the mess magically go away. So we move on to the final phase--acceptance--and call on the arsenal of cleaning machines at our disposal--the mighty Dyson, the Bissel Spot-Bot, and the Bissel Steam Mop. Because there's really nothing I'd rather do after a full day of work than come home and give my house a deep clean. LIES! I JUST WANT TO RELAX, DAMMIT! WHY DO YOU DO THIS TO ME, LUKE? WHYYYYYYYY?!

I'd like to mention that we even bought a supposedly pet-proof trash can with a lock to prevent curious snouts from exploring discarded food stuffs. Either that lock is a piece of junk, or Luke is Doggy MacGuyver. (Fun Fact: Richard Dean Anderson, MacGuyver himself, went to my alma mater, Ohio University.) I have a hard time opening that blasted trash can lock, so let's just go with the Doggy MacGuyver theory, shall we?

But as annoying as cleaning up the trash is, it's very hard to stay mad at him. I mean, just look at this face...


I tried to fix his flash-induced demon blue eyes, but they still look rather creepy, no? Oh, well. He's still a very pretty princess.

17 comments:

CassJustCurious said...

Every dog has his weakness. So sweet that greyhound of yours!

ria said...

it's amazing the things dogs get away with. how about scooby chewing holes in our NEW ($2500, haven't started paying on...) couch. i need a xanax...

Jessica said...

gay dog?

Just Fine Just Dandy said...

Oh dogs - how we love them and how they infuriate us. Good thing you love him and won't be taking him back. I fear lots of people do this!

Anyhow Bissel Spot Bot and Steam Mop? These tools sound wonderful! I must check into them immediately.

Also your dog has BLUE eyes? How cool is that? You must find a way to take a picture so that I can see this blue eyed doll!

Mermanda said...

Just Fine Just Dandy, I think I was confusing... he doesn't have blue eyes but when I take his picture, the flash bounces off his eyes in a way that makes them look blue. Kind of like how humans get red eyes in photos. It's really hard to edit them out for dogs, though.

Sensibly said...

oh dogs...their sweetness out weighs any nutty-ness thankfully!

Hillary said...

Stella eats poop.
I win.

Andrew said...

Remember when I told Lucas I was going to hollow out his bed and fill it with his own poop? I decided not to do that. I feel strangely kind today.

Rae // theNotice said...

I love Luke posts =D He sounds like an angel! (Except for the whole... eating trash bit. Perhaps it would help if you kept your trashbin under the sink, and put a child-lock on the cabinet doors?)

Non Sequitur Chica said...

We bought a trash can that you have to step on a lever in order to open it. Our dog hasn't gotten into the trash since. You can find them at Bed, Bath & Beyond.

Also, while our dog is awesome? She likes to eat cat poo, goose poo and deer poo. Ewwww.

Mermanda said...

Non Sequitur Chica, ours does have a lever... and a lock. We're basically screwed.

alyssa said...

Ahhh yesss! Ours don't get into the trash can..but if they can't find anything on the counters or tables to snatch, they may pull out a magazine from my stash and rip it to shreds. Yeah, what you said about LOVING coming home to clean...totally getcha!

Kyla Roma said...

Our dogs are so little, but so clever it's terrifying. Ash is a garbage monster too, so much that after trying different garbage designs (I almost bought one of those locking ones too!!) & locations we just have to move the can outside before we leave or we put a baby gate up so they can't get into the kitchen.

Just make sure you don't leave anything poisonous to him (onions, grapes..) in your garbage & good luck finding a work around! At least he doesn't have thumbs, then you'd really be in trouble!

instatick said...

SadieDog occasionally gets into the trash. But when she does, it's like she's just trying to piss us off. Like, she'll remove on single paper towel from the trash can in my office and shred it in a million pieces. But that's it.

I almost went to OU. I lived in and around Athens for several years and still miss it to this day.

sarah marie p said...

Awww, that picture of you and Luke is too cute!

And yes, he does make a very pretty princess!

That's so sweet that Luke let Charlie the three-legged-dog love on him!

But oh what a bad baby with that trash! I need to blog about how Abbie is eating every random tidbit she finds around the house ... and how she's making a nasty mess with her potty pads. I TOTALLY agree that cleaning right when you get home from work is NO fun at all!

Good thing Luke is such a sweetheart & handsome boy!

Ben said...

Be happy with the trash eating...there's worse. WORSE.

Steph said...

Wow so many garbage eating dogs in your comments too! At least you're not alone! Ours don't get into things in the house, but they love to dig in the backyard and bark at squirrels? Doesn't bother me too much though. They're dogs, what can you say.