Tuesday, May 26, 2009

Tiny Dancer

At our staff retreat last Wednesday, my entire department had to take time management surveys. One question was aimed at our health.

Fill in the blank:

I exercise when ______________.

My answer: I'm being graded in gym class.

Seriously, that's very accurate considering I can't even tell you the last time I broke a sweat on purpose. That is, until last Thursday.

Raise your hand if you've heard of Zumba.

Okay, well remind me never to use the old "raise your hand" device on my blog again, because it really isn't as effective as I had hoped.

Anyhow, Zumba is an aerobic workout inspired by Latin dance. If I knew any Latin dance moves, I'd probably have not sucked so incredibly badly at my first Zumba experience last Thursday. Okay, that's not true. It probably wouldn't have made a difference.

My friend Jess and I decided to crash a Zumba class at a local church--despite the fact that we both claim to hold the title for "most uncoordinated person ever."

As expected, hilarity ensued when we were the only first-timers there. When we were instructed to spin, I'd inevitably be the only one in the class spinning counter-clockwise. Every. Time. Jess' jaw dropped when she realized that there is in fact a living person more uncoordinated than she--and that person is me.

I think more humiliating than my performance was my appearance. What is it about work out clothes that make me revert back to my insecure flat-chested junior-high self? I felt about 14 years old in my purple tee and pink shorts. (Changing up the color palette at tonight's class, thankyouverymuch.)

Surrounded by beautiful, fit, young women, I felt more clumsy than ever. Why do they look so natural and seductive shaking and shimmying--and I look--epileptic?

Jess whispered to me, "How old do you think these girls are?"

I said, "undergrads, probably... but I'm sure they all think I'm in junior high."

"Probably," Jess giggled.


Hillary said...

There is a Zumba studio half a block from my condo. I'm always intrigued when I walk by but haven't worked up the courage to go inside yet.
Good luck tonight!

Tam said...

No pole dancing?

Zumba is great fun - you should have seen when Ellen Degeneres featured it on her show last year - hilarious!

I took it last quarter at the university - you are going to be a lean, mean, dancing machine by the time your wedding gets here.

Next up...spinning!

Anonymous said...

Zumba... pssshhhh.

I've heard of it. My girlfriend are CRAZY about this new thing. I refuse to go mostly because I'm stubborn and probably more so because I would look like a complete idiot.

Lauren said...

Zumbas hard i hear! Good luck with it!

I always manage to look like i'm from the 80's when working out. Somehow my outfits scream "flash dance!" I don't get it.

thatShortchick said...

::raises both hands:: Zumba is so much fun!!

although, once, i had to deal with an instructor who was more concerned with how his muscles were gleaming with his sweat than with teaching actual moves.

Kyla Roma said...

lol I never left the awkward, flat chested 14 year old girl phase so I totally relate. I love working out...at home! Away from the Amazons! And also the Zumbabians too now lol

Pretty Unfamous said...

Duquesne has a zumba class, but I've never taken it. I've heard it's really hard. I'll stick to yoga.

That's IF I get to the gym!

Maxie said...

God I wish I had zumba here! I love it.

Unknown said...

Uncoordinattion adds character. That's my story and I'm sticking to it. Have fun!

sarah marie p said...

Oooh I think my gym offers Zumba ... but I'm way too scared to try! Too bad we aren't neighbors -- I could try Zumba with you! I may be even more uncoordinated than you. Seriously, I got no skills! And I bet I would feel super awkward doing the moves because I'm so tall, I would feel like a weird giant!