Friday, January 16, 2009

Cracking up about crackers

Yesterday afternoon I called Andrew while he was at work. He answered his cell and said in an urgent manner, "Can I call you back in fifteen minutes?" Assuming it was some work-related crisis, I said, "Sure," And waited patiently.

He calls me back a little later and I ask him a question about wedding planning, blah blah. Fast forward to later that evening:

Andrew: "Did I tell you about our cracker eating contest? That's what we were doing when you called me earlier."

Me: "A cracker eating contest?"

Andrew: "Yeah, you know those little orange peanut butter cracker sandwiches? Well, John said it's impossible to eat six of them in a minute."

Okay, people, so picture five grown men AT WORK stuffing crackers down their gullets with stop watches keeping official time.

That's a pretty entertaining image. But then when you add this article from yesterday's Washington Post--it's FREAKING HILARIOUS!

Maker Recalls Peanut Butter As 2 More Die of Salmonella
By Sue Lindsey
ROANOKE, Jan. 14 -- A peanut butter maker that sells bulk supplies to institutions issued a nationwide recall as officials on Wednesday reported two more deaths associated with a salmonella outbreak.

Lynchburg-based Peanut Corp. of America issued the recall late Tuesday for 21 lots of peanut butter made since July 1 at its plant in Blakely, Ga., because of possible salmonella contamination. The company supplies peanut paste to Kellogg Co., which on Wednesday asked stores nationwide to pull peanut butter crackers sold under the Austin and Keebler brands.


Oh, Andrew. You little idiot. :)

EDIT: Sorry, guys. I didn't mean to leave you hanging like that. No one was able to eat six under a minute... but someone got close with five. It took Andrew 1:47 to eat all six.

25 comments:

Dwight said...

That is classic!

Hillary said...

6 in a minute? that's nothing!

alyssa said...

LOL hahaha. Your title made me...crack up. Hah, oh yeah..i'm hilarious...

Mermanda said...

Hillary, apparently that's what they thought until they tried it. I demand a vlog of you going for it! :)

Deutlich said...

Because of how crackers dry up the saliva in a mouth, and the fact that you NEED saliva to both chew and swallow properly, I would bet that he (nor anyone else) could do it.

adriana said...

Today at my office a bunch of us went down into our parking lot and had 100 yard races. Yes. Crackers don't sound so strange for me!

Alicia said...

So am I to take it take it that they didn't make it? I wonder if a professional eater would be able to do that, like that crazy Japanese guy.

thatShortChick said...

LOL. are they going to be experimenting with other foods in the future?

Angela said...

I've heard that before. I heard it was impossible, though, just to eat six saltine crackers in a minute.

Sophia said...

and??? did anyone make it? or, I guess I should ask, did anyone get salmonella? haha oh boys.

Mermanda said...

See my update. No one made it.

Rae said...

LOL!! He better be okay, or when he gets better we're all going to make you kick is ass.

(We would, but it's hard to do through a computer!)

rachel said...

oh this was too funny. silly boys. :)

Rachel said...

hmmmmm....I'm thinking I could do it. I have pretty big mouth....

Tam said...

This sounds like something my husband would do (if he had a job).

You didn't mention if anyone has died of salmonella....

Man those frikin PB crackers are good. This post makes me want to eat one (not six).

Zip n Tizzy said...

Don't need to imagine it... have seen this one in action. It seems to be a guy thing.
Good thing they couldn't finish huh?

Kyla Bea said...

Oh my gosh - this is something that would totally break out in my workplace. This is classic!

your wishcake. said...

Muaha! That is such a guy thing. Cracker eating contest. Silly boys.

:)

Let's just hope that the outbreak spares him, right? Heehee.

Tattooed Dorothy said...

The frat boys in college used to do the gallon challenge, where they tried to drink a gallon of milk in a minute. Makes me sick just thinking about it!

*jimaie.marie* said...

this is hilarious!! oh man, kinda makes me want to try but then....there was salmonella. LOL!! i hope an outbreak doesnt erupt in his workplace, Aaaa!! but the visual of this contest is cracking me up! :D

KatieSaysSo said...

lol oh my gosh that is hilarious!a

sarah marie p said...

Ewwww salmonella in pnut butter crackers?! Grosssssss! Obviously salmonella in anything is nasty but that just sounded especially bad. Anyways, I'm so glad Andrew survived the cracker incident. He really needs to up his game though. I'm sure, with enough practice, he could totally eat six in a minute. I know you'll be a wonderful coach in this noble sport.

Maris said...

Haha - I would have loved to see their attempt. That's some serious work/life balance going on there.

Steph said...

That is so hilarious! Really. Guys. haha.

Non Sequitur Chica said...

My fiance has continued to eat peanut butter crackers even through the recall. He's silly.